Week 20: This Week’s Winning Stories
Orange rolled to the second part of the counter. The orange (conveniently named Orange) stopped before falling off the counter. The door is the only way, the only way out, thought Orange. Orange hoped not to attract any attention, as he was quite loud.
Orange set a course for the door; the trash looked like a possible exit, but he had to remind himself not to get distracted. Orange rolled off the counter and onto the ground. The family dog trotted by, stopped, and grabbed Orange in his jaws. He had trouble getting traction; the dog’s mouth was very slobbery. While in the dog’s mouth, he realized that escaping was such an abstract idea. All the other oranges talked about getting eaten or growing a tree. Orange suddenly heard the voice of a human.
“Tut! Hey, Tut! What are you doing you silly boy?” the human said, starting to pet the dog’s head. The human spotted the less than attractive orange, and let out an “ugh.”
The unwilling human tried to extract the orange from Tut’s mouth. The human tugged on the orange for a protracted amount of time. The dog proved intractable. The human looked around for one of the dog’s attractions.
The human found a treat, gave it to Tut, and the brown mutt dropped Orange. The human picked up Orange and hurled him into the trash along with a broken toy tractor. Yes, Orange thought.
“Oh, looks like the garbage truck is here,” the human called. “Time to take out the trash.”
She is attractive, tough like a tractor,
She has soft as silk black fur.
She has floppy ears,
That distract her when she runs.
And a protracted, long snout.
When you pet her,
You react, calm and relaxed.
If you drop a treat on the ground,
She will subtract that treat.
When she barks, she attracts dogs.
Like saying hello in dog.
Rosie can distract you,
From what you are trying to do.
And Rosie has a skill,
Of detracting socks.
My love for Rosie is not abstract.
Past Years’ Winning Stories
I look up at the attractive night,
The abstract content a beautiful sight.
I retract my thoughts,
Of the wars I fought,
And look straight into the future.
Then I hear a crack from the clearing,
Is my mind so quiet as to attract a creature?
It must be only what I am hearing.
One day gone by, and still,
I cannot distract my imagination.
Is it my fault that I can’t kill,
The dangerous questions that can destroy a nation?
They ask me if I like it,
They ask me if I don’t.
They ask me if I’ll tell the truth,
They ask me if I won’t.
Two days gone by, and still,
The attraction of my answers,
is far beyond my will.
My head feels full stuffed with thoughts,
Thoughts that glide, like little dancers.
Three days gone by, and still,
The subtraction of my fears,
Is impossible to me.
No clicking of my heels,
Nor any word, you see,
Can take my stress away.
They ask me if I like it,
They ask me if I don’t.
They ask me if I’ll tell the truth,
They ask me if I won’t.
Four days gone by, and still,
I can not extract those questions,
I have no answer to fulfill,
All of their endless questions.
And I can not find my traction,
In these ripped up silver shoes,
For if I click my heels there is no sort of action.
Well, I’ll contract the real truth and I’ll tell them what I think,
I have nothing to lose.
They ask me if I like it,
They ask me if I don’t,
They ask me if I’ll tell the truth,
They ask me if I won’t.
Then I hear my voice evaporate,
And I see my words give way,
Though, I stand up tall,
To tell them all,
I shall speak no words,
The Math Test
I stare down at the math test on my desk. Oh great, I think. I take out my protractor, just in case. The first problem looks easy enough. Subtraction is something I’ve known since kindergarten, so number one will be easy.
“Five…” I mutter under my breath as I write down my answer.
The second problem is a word problem. An abstract painting is two feet by one foot. What is the area? Oh, wow. This math test seems pretty easy so far.
“Two square feet…” I write as my answer.
The next problem seriously stumps me. A tractor’s wheel is one-meter long. The tractor drives thirty meters before stopping. How many times does the wheel go around? I have not learned this concept yet. I decide to find refuge by looking out the window. I am attracted by an attractive monarch butterfly.
“Pay attention!” my grumpy teacher snaps, trying to detract from my nature-gazing and refocus me. I look at my paper, but think about the carnival attraction that I would much rather be at than here at school. I try to figure out the problem I am stuck on, instead of being distracted by the carnival.
I look back out the window. I see a tractor driving across a farm next to the school. Suddenly, the answer hits me. Thirty! The only problem: I have no idea if I am correct or not. In fact, I don’t really think that I have answered any of these problems correctly. You see, I have not always been the brightest in math, but not so bad.
“Okay, class. Time’s up. Turn in your papers!” my teacher says. I protract the process of turning in my paper as long as possible. Eventually, I stand up and place my paper in the basket. This whole day has been intractable!
The next day, I walk into class with a feeling of dread. I see kids looking at their tests. Oh, no. We received our scores today. I walk over to my desk, expecting to see an F-. Instead, I see an A+. Maybe that test wasn’t so bad after all!
Wish Me Luck
Now, I’ll admit, I’m exceptionally good at making excuses and worming my way out of situations, but I just couldn’t get past this one. Maybe it’s because dentists and mothers are really smart, or maybe it’s because I’m good with shots and needles, but when it comes to teeth, I’m a wreck. Whatever the reason, I had to get the two things I’m most afraid of, and this is the story of my experience.
“Yup, this tooth will definitely have to be extracted,” said Doctor Q.
Nooooo! I thought, feeling my muscles contract. I then tried to distract myself by thinking about something from school that day, Um……Oh, oh! Abstract art, or…subtraction…No no no! I’ve got it! What about that tractor that attracted my attention today during writing!
It was no use. I couldn’t think about anything but the conversation my mom and the dentist were having about my cavity. They paused for a moment, and then my mom said, “We have an appointment for your tooth, which will be taken out on February 26th, okay, Alice?”
I pretended I didn’t hear her, not wanting to face the truth. I could tell that after a minute, she knew I was protracting my avoidance. “Did you hear my question?”
“Hmm?” I said, turning around.
“These procrastinations will in no way detract you from getting your tooth pulled, Alice,” my mother said knowingly as I rummaged around, trying to find a prize for my appointment that I liked.
“What do you mean?” I questioned, retracting my hand from the prize bucket.
“You know what I mean,” she answered, looking me square in the eye, “Oh, and by the way, Doctor Q. has just told me that you will need braces as well; your two front teeth have a huge hole in between them, and your bottom teeth, well, let’s just say they’re not much better.”
I covered my teeth with my hand, feeling self conscious.
“But—” I started, thinking there was still hope of me winning the argument.
“No buts; this is final,” she said, interrupting me.
Oh, great, I thought, well, wish me luck; there’s no way I can get out of this situation.
“Ahhh, finally extracted from school after a short day,” I say to myself as I walk through the front door, entering my home. So, here I am walking into my somewhat humble home and as soon as I enter the kitchen, my heart practically leaves my chest cavity as my mom jumps out at me yelling,”SURPRISE!”
“Mom, what’s the deal? I’m walking here, you know,” I say, extremely mad that she pulled a boogeyman on me–or for you normal people, surprised or scared me.
“Well, I got you a video game because you’ve been getting good grades in school,”she says kind of mysteriously. “Try to guess what it is; you have three tries. GO!” she yells.
“Ok,ummm…Batman Arkham Knight?” I guess, hoping that is right.
“Nope; keep going,”she says, looking more excited than ever.
“All right…oh, Minecraft?” I say, taking another shot in the dark.
“Wrong again; one more try,” she says, her face literally redder than a tomato.
“Star Wars Battlefront?” I say, filled with hope and thinking to myself, “HERE I COME DARTH VADER!”
“Incorrect. I’ll just tell you,it is…Galaga!” she yells as she pulls out a small black box with a big joystick, two buttons on top, and the words GALAGA on the side.
I look at it as if she’s trying to hand me a rotten fish. “I uh, um, uhhhhhh,” I respond, feeling like my voice just quit.
“I knew you would like it! You’re welcome, hon, go enjoy yourself,” she announces after a long pause and a longer look at my face.
I’ve heard of this game before…from my dad, who played it when he was around my age. How did my mom even get her hands on this sorry excuse for a game? Did she meet the developers and make a contract: “If my son does well in school he gets a copy of this piece of trash.”
Also, now thinking about it, if this game was never invented or somehow subtracted from existence, then my life would be easier because now my mom expects me to play this “game” and like it. I had thought she was going to be attracted to the new games like the ones I guessed or maybe COD Black Ops 3 or something, not some game from almost 30 years ago, though I shouldn’t be complaining. She did put some thought into getting this…I hope. I plug the game into the T.V and the words “Play Now” pop onto the screen.
“Well, here goes nothing,” I say to myself as I unwillingly press start.
The game begins with a bunch of half ovals shaped like protractors at the bottom with a blue spaceship, which I can only assume is me, behind them.That’s when I see a bunch of oddly shaped “aliens” start flying all over the screen, shooting the ovals, which I also figure are shields. I’m able to shoot as well, so I start to fire at the aliens. Each shot I get makes them just completely disappear, but one of them catches me off guard as it grabs me and extracts my ship and pulls it upward off the screen with some kind of abstract tractor beam.
Two lives left, so I begin again with everything refreshed. I attract half of the fleet’s attention and lead them over to the left side so I can deal with the other half while the half on the left is distracted by my shields and vice versa. Another alien gets past my defenses and rams into my ship, blowing me up.
One life left. After about 30 more minutes, I have finally made it to meet and battle the final alien commander.
“Okay, Jackson, time for homework,” Mom says as she come out of her cat nap.
“All right,” I say as I turn off the T.V. A second before I do press power off, I see the mother ship retract into space. Game over for now.
Cotton Candy, REALLY!
“Shhhh!” Dane said. “You don’t want to attract any attention,” Dane silently whispered. A guard was pacing back and forth up ahead. Dane and Ash silently creep up behind the guard. “Ash, what I want you to do is tap on his sho- SNAP!” Dane was in shock. “ASH I TOLD YOU TO TAP ON HIS SHOULDER!” Dane yelled. “But we wouldn’t be able to get past him then” He complained. “BUT YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO SNAP HIS NECK!” Dane exclaimed. “Sorry,” Ash said. Then they both hear heavy footsteps coming down the hall.
Both of them had to retract to the closet next to them to not be seen by the person coming down the hallway. They hear a gasp then a lever being pulled. BEEP BEEP BEEP………BEEP BEEP BEEP. “Of all times, the lock-down had to start now,” Dane said sarcastically. When the coast was clear Dane and Ash opened the closet door and slowly creeped out of the crack. Dane scanned the area for guards and escape routes. “Well, I guess we’re stuck in this trash hole,” Dane complained. “I got some tricks up my sleeve though!” Ash said with a huge grin on his face.
Now Dane and Ash were still on the floor to them, but to us it’s more like the ceiling. “How did you get these?” Dane asked. “Oh it was a long process, I had to sign a contract and everything, crazy,” Ash said. “So what now?” Dane asks. “I guess find the main route to the exit and leave?” Ash answered. “Hm….pretty simple,” Dane said. Dane and Ash stroll upon the ceiling for quite a while until the anti-gravity boots were at 1% battery. SMASH! “Aw man, what now?” Ash said. As Dane and Ash find a way out Mr.Dr.Prof.Patrick is using his protractor to find the right angles for his secret weapon.
“Ash, i’m pretty you don’t need to use subtraction to pick a lock,” Dane said. “Just wait,” Ash replied. Click! “Hey it worked!” Dane said. Inside the room was a dog. A gigantic dog. Just think of the size of one of those abstract purple busses from Harry Potter. Now think of it 10 times bigger. “Wow, tough security,” Ash said. Ash and Dane slowly walk past the sleeping hound quietly closing the door behind them. Once they turned around a tall man with ragged black hair, cracked glasses, and a crazy grin on his face was standing over them. This man was the dreaded Mr.Dr.Prof.Patrick. “I’ve been expecting you two,” Patrick said. “Uhhhhhh HEY LOOK NOT CRACKED GLASSES OVER THERE!” Ash yelled trying to distract him. “That’s not a good choice of words my friend,” Patrick answered.
Patrick had strapped both Ash and Dane to Frankenstein like tables and had a giant machine sitting in front of them. “My plan is to turn you both into my evil pet mutants,” Patrick said. “And how does that work?” Dane asked. “My device will extract your blood and replace that blood with mutagen, then you will become under my control and become my evil weapons,” Patrick said with a maniacal laugh at the end. “Let’s get started, shall we?” Patrick said.
“I never thought I would go out like this,” Ash said. “At the hands of a man with three abbreviations in his name?” Dane asked. ”No, at the hands of-wait actually yes,” Ash said. While Ash and Dane say their goodbyes Patrick is making sure the traction is right and the tractor beam pulling the blood is working correctly. “Ok are you ready to experience the transformation of a lifetime!” Patrick said. Without and answer Patrick switched on the machine and sat back to see the transformation happen. Instead he saw a bunch of Cotton Candy shoot out of the machine.
“ARE YOU KIDDING ME!” Patrick screams.
Look At That Tractor, and Wish Me Luck
My class just finished the math lesson where we were learning how to use protractors. Then it was time for poetry. I look at my paper, and I read the poem in my head.
Look at that tractor
It is a huge attraction
Everybody in town wants to see it
It distracts people
From looking at the road
So there are lots of car crashes
Look at that tractor!
“All students must have at least two abstract nouns in their poems; if you do not have any; there is no emotion,” my teacher said, so I added this:
I love that tractor
It symbolizes hope
I read my poem over in my head, and then subtracted the line that said, “So there are lots of car crashes.”
I was not a good poet at all. At least that was what I thought. I read my partner’s poem, and then I felt like my poem was more like second grade work. Her poem read
Because the carnival detracts
and the fair attracts so many people
The fair gets more customers
(because the workers at the carnival
are very intractable and stubborn)
Actually her poem made me feel a little better about myself.
“Also use contractions,” my teacher whispered in my ear, so I added this:
I’m very proud of my tractor
Look at that tractor!
So in the end, I had one horrible poem that I would have to share in front of the whole class. Wish me luck.
It was chipped and cracked, signs of age. The old, once yellow, house seemed to tilt to one side. The inside was filled with blue walls and abstract paintings everywhere. I mean, if you were to extract the giant protractor on the wall and remove the signed contract, which was an agreement to take care of a mangy, old cat, that was framed and stuck on a table, things would be less cluttered. The painting of a subtraction problem that was leaned against a desk shouldn’t detract from the look of the room, but it did.
As I looked around, I was distracted by an attractive picture of a dancing dog who seemed to have some attraction to a dancing cat. About a second later, I took a break and went outside to help my mom put my grandpa’s old tractor in the barn.
I don’t understand why my grandma liked being here so much when she was alive, but my mom says it is because this was her home.
Art and Its Ups and Downs
And all of it is eye-grabbing.
Some of it has crazy ideas.
It attracts the observer.
The painters may have intractable feelings;
They take it out on the paintings
That turn to works of art.
Some people retract from a painting,
While others spend protracted time delving into the painting,
But some get distracted as well.
People relate to the paintings;
Some have tractors, shoes, and many other things.
If a painting is not good enough anymore,
The museum curators extract it with no choice.
They can also detract the value of it,
But if a painting is just fantastic,
Then it’s going to be a great attraction.
The Old Tractor
I woke up at dawn to the smell of frying bacon, so I jumped out of bed and went into the kitchen where my great-grandmother was making a hot breakfast. I was so excited because today was the day I was going out to work on the farm with my great-grandfather! We finished breakfast, got dressed, and went out to the machine shed. There it was, the old tractor that had been in our family for a long time. It took a little bit of time to extract the tractor from the machine shed because it was surrounded by old junk. The noises we made started to attract the barn cats because they were looking for food.
It was my turn to try and drive so I hopped into the front seat and took the wheel. I turned the key, pressed the gas pedal, and there was a major contraction when the engine started. I drove around the farm a couple of times before we headed out towards the fields. As we drove, I left abstract tire marks along the road. I was distracted by the attractive landscape, and all of a sudden, one of the tires lost traction. I started to panic so my great-grandfather had to take over and retract the gear shifter, which had gotten stuck. My great-grandfather mentioned that he still had a warranty contract for the old tractor so he could get it fixed. We finished the work in the fields and went home to a delicious tasting apple pie.
The carnival, the place you go to ride tons of exciting roller coasters, eat tons of cotton candy, and play over priced ring-toss games. There are many attractive booths you can visit, lots of vendors trying to attract you with sugar-covered bread, and lots of prizes to win; but the main attraction is the roller coasters. The thrill of the wind whipping your face and the gut wrenching twist you feel in your stomach when a loop-da-loop comes brings happiness to peoples’ faces. The chill that goes down your back when someone makes you sign a contract before you get on, and when you get off, they try to detract from your shock by showing you the cotton candy booth. The vibrant colors of the abstract art that artists are trying to sell, the knowledge that you don’t have to add, subtract, multiply, or divide because you’re not in school, and the fact that there are tractors behind the gate that’s behind the big tent, give people the idea that this carnival was worked hard on to make it superior. All these things distract from the reality that there are less than satisfactory toilets and many of the items sold are over-priced. The carnival is certainly a place of happiness and thrills.
I see the tractors in the fields
and flowers that attract my eyes with awe,
the distracting melodic birds,
and the exquisite, vivid colors across the sky,
the meticulous trees
and the intractable spring breeze,
But in curiosity, where does everything go when spring is gone?
Positive and Negatives
Perseverance; this one word describes my story. I am trying to make it big in this harsh dog-eat-dog world. My rock band, The Positive and Negatives, is practicing in my garage. Every day we attract all kinds of people to listen to our music. I play lead guitar and do vocals. I also play keyboard, bass, and a little bit of drums, but for our band, I play guitar. Our dream is to win Battle of the Bands, get the $50,000 grand prize, upgrade our instruments, and get a record contract. I start plucking at my guitar and finish my guitar solo.
“… and that is why we’re such a big attraction because we are POSITIVE AND NEGATIVES!!” I finished singing and then strummed the last chord.
“Yeah, that was great we’ll win the Battle of the Bands for sure,” I said after we had finished.
Later at school, I was fiddling with my protractor in Calculus. I was only a freshman. My friend last year was having trouble with subtraction while I was doing Algebra 1. I couldn’t think about math because I was busy thinking about how I couldn’t wait till tryouts for the Battle of the Bands. I saw the clock ticking and saw the hand move to three. I jumped out of my seat and ran to the gym for the Battle of the Bands tryout. I was like a tractor plowing through everyone. I ran onto the stage with my friends and started strumming.
“… WE ARE ATTRACTIVE!!!” I finished singing.
“You were amazing. You’re in; see you on Friday,” the judges said excitedly. Yeah, that’s not really how it happened; it was more like this:
“Due to there being only four entries, I guess you’re in,” the judge said, seeming bored as he waved us off. I was giddy with excitement. I got distracted, and my guitar went crashing to the ground. I watched it like it was in slow motion. I wanted to do something, but I couldn’t move. I watched my guitar smash into a million pieces. My guitar was completely destroyed. How were we going to win now? I thought.
It was the day before the Battle of the Bands, and I was begging my brother for his guitar.
“I’ll pay you $500 for it by tomorrow,” I pleaded.
“You better,” he snarled. Now that I had a way to purchase a new guitar, we could play the Battle of the Band.
The Battle of the Bands couldn’t have come sooner. We started playing and the audience’s attention was detracting from out performance. We had to re-attract their attention. We had to do something abstract or unexpected. I gave the signal to the band to stop playing. I busted out a guitar solo and then pointed to the drummer, who gave a rad solo, followed by our bass player. We finished the song, and the crowd erupted with applause. We were given the trophy; we had just won the Battle of the Bands.
You live around tractors
and amusement attractions alike,
You attract beetle-snatching birds
when you fly higher than reality
never knowing when you will be
subtracted from the world
by nature’s vicious cycle
You stumble upon wicked spiders
distracting you with
bedazzling water-blotted, silk webs
while the spider retracts, its web
already around you,
extracting your beautiful life essence
from your innocent beetle soul
you are nature’s abstract idea,
while at the same time being as intractable as quartz,
you cannot be measured by any protractor
of any known sort
My Tractor Dilemma
During my last year in college, I had a tractor and it was very attractive. My mom said “Don’t let it distract you from your studies,” but I did. I signed a contract that stated it would be on display at the city museum for a tourist attraction. Its name would be “The Tractor!” It wasn’t very creative, but at least it was going to be on display.
What I didn’t realize was that it was extremely hard to extract it from the field. There wasn’t enough traction between the ground and the tires, so it wouldn’t move. Since the tractor had to be at the museum by Friday, and it was Monday, I hardly had any time between school and this! So I had to attract an assistant to help me get the tractor to the museum in time.
Even with an assistant to help me, I found out the hard way that working on everything for the tractor did start to detract from my studies. I still needed to do school work, so the date of the display would have to be extended, but the museum owner said he couldn’t protract the show dates. This became an intractable difficulty. I had to figure this out while doing my finals. I ended up flunking my finals, but the tractor museum exhibit went well. I was in for another year of college, and I learned to never let anything get in the way of my studies again.
Today’s the Day: A Rap
Today’s the day
And win the game
All our haters gonna fade away
We gonna win the game
win the game win the game
Niners gonna win the bowl
Only got one more game to go
The thing that extracts us from the other team
Is we got Kaepernick who plays real mean
All the fans gather around the TV
To watch the biggest attraction
During the Super Bowl I block out every distraction
These big football players sure aren’t intractable
But they’re gonna attack the Ravens like a heard of angry bulls
All the haters gonna retract their thoughts
When they see us with the trophy on top
When you get tackled by Willis it feels like your getting hit by a tractor
He might even give you a fracture
After they all signed their contracts
They knew this year was gonna be a comeback
We gonna abstract this trophy
Because we got Crabtree
This whole year they had to protract their game
Because we wouldn’t be here if it stayed the same
Once we subtract
All the negative feedback
And think about this great year
We’ve got no fear
The (Un)Attractive Tractor
Somewhere in the world there is a freaky farm, and the animals on this freaky farm are intractable. There are explosions, rocket ships, sheep that pass gas, and even flying pigs, but there is also a cow that is fairly strange.
A few weeks ago on the freaky farm, there was an abstract situation. The cuckoo cow was at it again, falling in love with inanimate objects. A month ago, she fell in love with a protractor, and two weeks before that, she was in love with the farmer’s contract! Now her heartthrob is the farmer’s first tractor! The only thing that the tractor attracts is the farmer and the cow. The cow’s attraction is worse; the only thing she attracts is flies, and they’re a real pain. The way the animals solved these problems before is that the sheep ate the contract. To solve the other “love problem,” the pig flew the protractor into space, but this issue will be harder to solve.
This tractor’s tires were bare, so it had no traction. It was rusty, and there was moss growing on it. Everyone thought the tractor was ugly except the farmer, who thought it was “breath-taking.” The farmer didn’t want to get rid of the tractor, so he thought of a not-so-complicated scheme to distract the cow.
The next day, the sheep, the pigs, and the farmer went to the tractor. The sheep distracted the cow by passing gas, and then the pigs flew the tractor to the roof. The cow was devastated when her crush had vanished. The cow soon got over her sad “break up,” but shortly, she was at it again.
Long ago, in the land of Autumnal, lived an attractive warrior squirrel named Nestral. Fall wind ruffled his bushy tail that trailed behind him, his retracted blade bouncing on his back as he sprinted through the forest to his destiny. Nothing could distract him from his quest to find Ulfrin the Abstract, an evil-doer who had stolen a priceless contract that kept harmony between the animals.
Nestral’s sleek frame did the opposite of detract from the beautiful scenery. After days of running and sleep, extracted only infrequently from his quest, Nestral’s nose was finally attracted to the scent of Ulfrin.
Nestral finally reached Ulfrin two days later, but not before the first snowfall. All of the lakes and rivers had frozen over. Ulfrin was camped out at the edge of a lake. Nestral tried to sneak up on him, but Ulfrin heard Nestral and immediately dashed for the frozen lake. Nestral followed, but slipped and slid, struggling to gain traction on the ice.
Nestral swung his blade and succeeded in slicing Ulfrin’s ear clean off. Ulfrin, with a bloodlust in his eyes, swung his blade into Nestral’s leg. An intractable pain coursed through Nestral as the blade met his fur. Staggering, Nestral swung his blade one last time, slicing Ulfrin in two. Nestral retrieved the contract and returned it to its rightful place among the woodlanders.
Super Fun Land
A young man named Tony Lee was determined to reach his goal and potential ability to build an amusement park. He was greedy for attraction and wanted to attract as many people as he could. Nothing could distract this immature, greedy man from building Super Fun Land.
Young Tony continued his greediness and hired innocent workers as “slaves” for minimum wage to increase his over-the-top income for the project. He started out with his main priorities: food, rides, and games/activities. So he started there.
One of his co-workers, Robert, brought in a crane and tractor to at least have a start on the back-breaking, dreadful roller coasters. He started out making a contract with a man for the wood and other materials. He made his workers manage the tractors to bring the loads into Super Fun Land. They used their subtraction skills to manage the amount in each pile. Then came the task of the disgustingly greasy food. He got a bright yellow popcorn machine, dark brown corn dog machine, and a turquoise, overly-sugared cotton candy maker.
Additionally, came the creation of the games. Unfortunately, for the customers, Robert had to extract the games because of extremely expensive expenses. The only downside about this important decision was that it would detract the attention of anyone under the age of ten.
Clink! The brand new, beautiful, black gates opened, as the first customer strutted into the innovated Super Fun Land. The man finished his interaction at the front desk, walked up, and noticed this place was a “puzzle piece” of fun and enjoyment. That was the start of the amazingly over-the-top traction of the people to the bit by bit development of Super Fun Land.
One Hope amid the Hopeless
I stare at the blank canvas, my ideas as colorful as the oils on the palette beside me. I pluck at the horse hair brush in my antsy fingers, longing to begin the work of art I was naturally born to do. Finally, settling on an idea, I begin long strokes of yellow, a few touches of blue, blobs of rich crimson and royal gold. Days later, the canvas, no longer recognizable in its ornate gown of colors, is finished. I pay the man his money and whisper in his ear, “You know what to do.”
When I am gone, the man dips a scraggly, aged quill in ink and adds his signature to the lower right-hand corner of the painting. Then, groaning under its weight, he precariously lugs the piece of work down to the teeming marketplace to auction it off to the highest bidder.
“Eleanor Jane Grant!” my mother screeches in that shrill voice of hers, “Where have you been? I demand an answer, young lady, right now.”
“Er, well, you see, Mother, I was just returning from, um, Aunt Delia’s house. Yes, you know how she always gets scared in that big house all alone, so I thought I might drop in to distract her with some of the latest gossip! Well, I’ll just go finish my embroidery now, Mother.”
“Oh, yes, darling! Make sure it looks lovely. We want you to seem attractive to your suitors!” She calls behind me as I duck hurriedly into my chamber. I collapse upon my bed in a defeated heap of despair. I don’t care about attracting men; all I want to attract are people who enjoy my paintings. How am I ever to become the greatest female artist of all of Knoxville if women aren’t even allowed to become painters? But I can’t very well tell anybody, with the exception of Frank, that those amazing pictures are done by me for fear that the knowledge the artist is female would detract from my pieces of art. Oh, what is a girl to do?
Madly splattering random colors on canvas, I look up to find Frank looking at me curiously. “Is it your mother again?” I can only manage a slow nod before I plunge back into my mess of color. I decide on the title, Abstract, for my new painting; it’s all about the few word titles, like one of my older paintings, Dilapidated Royal Tractor. I do painting after painting, but I cannot be satisfied. Horrible, horrible and horrible, I mutter to myself. I pinch my cheeks and splash water down my back, sending shivers streaking down my spine. Invigorated, I sit back and think, think of the hopes, dreams and desires waiting to be painted. I think about my dream, and decide I should paint it; I deserve to be heard. And so I begin, painstakingly at first, as I am unsure how I should approach it and what form it should take. But as time wears on, the painting takes shape and presently is ready to take into the marketplace. Only this time, Frank does not ink in his name; I write in mine.
My painting is the main attraction at the marketplace that Sunday, One Hope amid the Hopeless. It depicts one growth living among a barren dead area. The growth is no ordinary plant; it is a breathtaking cornflower blue flower, and out of its center blossoms a woman’s face, smiling. On the broad leaves are a pen and a brush. On another is the contract, the one I aspire to have happen and to become reality. A dim sun lets out poor rays of light, but as it approaches the plant, it brightens, creating a halo surrounding the flower. I sense the sudden contraction of breaths as the audience notices the signature in the lower right-hand corner: My name, Eleanor Jane Grant, the artist. Gradually a light applause breaks out among the crowd, and soon news of this female artist reaches the ears of the government. Nevertheless, I know everything is going to be all right because I have done it; I have made my mark on the world.
I now have a story written about me, written by a woman, too, I am proud and very pleased to announce, and my painting, One Hope amid the Hopeless, hangs in the lobby of the government building. Who knew?!
When Grandpa Comes
First, it is because of the way we spend time together. I love how I get to see him every day on his tractor, working with my dad on the ranch. But my mom says not to distract them while they are working, so I stay by the window and wave.
I also love listening to his stories from his youth. In fact, Grandpa tells tales from his childhood to when he got married and so on. I hate it when he tells stories about how attractive Grandma used to be because I simply can’t imagine Grandma in a sundress, and it is gross to hear that mushy stuff! Plus, I like to attract as much attention as possible on his stories of his dog, friends, and siblings.
I especially like it when he helps me with my third-grade homework. When he helps me with the math, we use subtraction, and we use a protractor when we play with angles and triangles. In spelling, I like how he explains the difference between verbs, adjectives, nouns, or adverbs. But, I find it boring while we are sitting at the kitchen table, and he is explaining to me what a contraction is.
After homework and chores, my mom lets me play with Grandpa. I run to my room and start to extract all of my toy cars, tractors, cows, and horses from my toy box. I lay out my fake grass, and Grandpa puts a tractor onto the grass and explains how traction helps when farming. We play for the rest of the afternoon, all the way till bedtime.
However, unfortunately, Grandpa has to go sometime, due to the contract he signed saying that he will work for one son till he reaches the age of eighty-five to ninety-three. On his last day, I always give him my favorite toy tractor to remind him of me every time he sees it. He leaves with a thousand goodbyes, hugs, and kisses. Even when he leaves, I can still imagine him playing with me. ♥
Let me tell you a story about how I started a successful produce stand. When I was young, I had an abstract thought that I wanted to grow fruits and vegetables on a farm for a living. That’s exactly what I did.
After graduating from high school, I bought a huge field of land and built a small wooden house to live in. I planted fruit and vegetable seeds in the fields, and I used my bright, red tractor when harvesting the fields. I always brought a pair of tweezers to extract the thorns out of my skin after picking from the rose bushes. Each year, I hired a few workers to do the tedious work on the farm. They did not have to sign a contract. My goal was to sell my produce in front of my farm and to attract people from my town to come buy their produce at my farm. Soon enough, my farm became very attractive.
Being a farmer, I experienced many good and bad things. One bad thing was that my feet had contractions at times because I was working in the fields too much. Another detraction was when I had to extract all the lettuce from the field after the gophers ruined it all. I hired an exterminator to catch the gophers, distracting the gophers while the exterminator trapped and caught them.
Even though there were some bad things about running a farm, it all paid off when my farm became a tourist attraction known for having the best produce in California.
The New School President
The teacher passed out PROTRACTORS to each and every one of her students; they were learning about measurements. One of the students, Obstinate Odessa, was INTRACTABLE, and did not accept the protractor, for she believed it was “used.” Ms. Rose sighed and handed Obstinate Odessa a SUBTRACTION worksheet instead. Obstinate Odessa slowly RETRACTED from the sheet. “I don’t want to do this. It hurts my arms to write.”
Later that day, the idea to relocate Obstinate Odessa didn’t gain much TRACTION among the school board members trying to find Obstinate Odessa a new school. “She won’t do any of her assignments, and she is stubborn as heck,” her teacher, Ms. Rose said, disappointed.
Soon, the idea of a new, special class for stubborn kids like Obstinate Odessa elicited a PROTRACTED discussion, beginning with the school board and leading out to the whole school until the idea became a reality.
The idea backfired on the teachers, for the novice teacher of the new class was easily DISTRACTED; in the previous session of the class, she spotted a rare butterfly and gazed at it for ten minutes.
As Ms. Rose argued with Mrs. Rehcate, Mrs. Rehcate put up a good fight. “The butterfly was rare! And it was ATTRACTIVE.”
Ms. Rose rolled her eyes. The principal stood up after he was done hearing their argument and eyed the new teacher. “You are fired.”
Mrs. Rehcate was shocked. She had been working at the school as president of the school board, not as a teacher, but still, she was utterly shocked. She stood up and left.
Later, after Mrs. Rehcate, who had DETRACTED from the school board, was SUBTRACTED from both the school board and the school, business got better. After all, the new school board president, Ms. Rose, did not get distracted and was always on task. In the next years, the school became the hottest ATTRACTION! The school board’s members were wealthy, but Mrs. Rehcate could not pay attention to anything, so the money remained unused. Now that Ms. Rose was president, things were about to get better.
In life, there are many attractive things, but where I was I didn’t know about any of that because I was living in the jungle. The only thing that was attractive to me was dinner, and usually that wasn’t a very pretty sight either. The only thing that really attracted me was the ocean, but even then I had to extract myself out of the water. For most of my life, I had been pretty intractable. I had always had an attitude whenever I encountered people. Although, usually I had been on the island alone, except for the animals, of course. I usually had to distract myself with constructing boats, scavenging for food, building shelter, but nothing had been stable. When it started to get dark, I always had a strong attraction to the luminous, full moon. That’s probably why I never got very scared in the jungle alone.
One strange morning, though, I had been gathering driftwood on the nearby beach, and I heard a peculiar whirring noise. I didn’t know what it was; it was a big, yellow thing that was using traction to carry items that it looked like were used for farming. It turns out it had once been a tractor, but the way it was moving was odd, and it moved by itself! I was staring wide-eyed with surprise as it kept cruising off, contracting in size as it drove farther and farther away. There was another vehicle there, too, and it looked as if it were detracting from the landscape, taking away the land they were on! Wait a minute; they were! At that moment, in pure shock, I started to gather all the boats I had constructed and selected the strongest one of the bunch.
In a day, I was packed and left the jungle immediately. I started rowing north until I could find land, searching for an area where it looked like there were docking places to store my rowboat. Sure enough there was a perfect spot, and I leaped off the boat immediately and tried to find where it looked like there was any sign of civilization. I found somewhere where it said Orphanage, but it was just some random place to me since I couldn’t read, and luckily there were a bunch of kids inside and adults, too! I walked slowly to the front desk and asked what the place was. The woman at the desk said I could just stay there, and that was what I did for almost five months. That was when I was adopted.
There were two lovely looking people who strode into the dorm room I was in and asked if I would like parents. I said I didn’t know what that was, but it sounded awfully cool! So I nodded my head in agreement and from then on, they were my parents!
In the Kingdom of Abstract
by Jordan R.
Once upon a time in the magical kingdom of Abstract, there lived a princess named Brick. Princess Brick was known far and wide for her magnificent beauty. People from all over the world visited Abstract just to get a glimpse of her beauty. Princess Brick was a very well-known attraction. But not all was well in Princess Brick’s life. It turned out that Princess Brick wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed, if you know what I mean! Actually, now that I think about it, she was the dullest. The king determined that this was because she had been dropped on her head as a baby, and ever since, she could only utter the rhyming sounds “duh,” and “uh.”
If you think that’s bad, then chew on this. Princess Brick also had two evil sisters, Daisy and Rose. Brick’s sisters hated her so much because she was Daddy’s favorite little girl and everyone liked Brick better than the other sisters because Daisy and Rose persisted in saying that the townspeople were all inferior compared to them. Rumor had it that the two girls banished a couple for not bowing to them when the sisters walked past their cottage in the village below the castle, and that’s not even the worst part!
One day, these evil sisters decided to get rid of Brick, but that was easier said than done. The evil sisters decided to make a contract with the sinister witches. The witches said that they would give Daisy and Rose a special object that would destroy Brick forever. There was one catch, though, and that was that someday, the witches would ask a favor of the evil sisters, and no matter what the favor, the sisters would have to fill it. Daisy and Rose were eager to receive the object that would destroy Brick, so they did not read the contract. When the sisters were handed the object, they oohed and ahhed with curiosity. As they stared at the object, Daisy said, “Wait. What’s so cool about it?”
The head witch replied, “Nothing; it’s just a dagger.”
“What?” exclaimed Rose in a shocked tone.
“Aww, man!” said Daisy in a disappointed manner.
“Beggars can’t be choosers,” responded the witches.
Then in a toddler-like tone Rose said, “Man, I thought I was going to make Brick go boom.” And on that note, the sisters went back to the castle to retract life from Brick with the dagger from the witches.
It took a day’s journey to get back to the castle, and once they were there, they expected a warm welcome, but no one even noticed they had been gone. Well, that’s not the whole truth. The truth is that everyone noticed they had been gone; they just didn’t care. They were actually happy the evil sisters had been away, and they even created a new holiday in honor of the event, calling it “Thank God They’re Gone Friday.”
The day after the sisters returned from their journey, they sneaked into Princess Brick’s room once everyone in the kingdom was asleep. They tried to extract Brick’s life-force by thrusting the dagger through her heart, but the guards awoke from their sleep, and the sisters fled before anything was done. Luckily, Brick was asleep so the evil sisters didn’t get caught. However, even if Brick did see them, her brain was too small and deformed to process the information fast enough for her to realize she was in danger.
The very next night, Rose screamed at the top of her lungs to distract the guards. Meanwhile, Daisy sneaked into Brick’s room, but unexpectedly, Brick was awake, so in mid-lunge toward Brick with the dagger, Daisy had to quickly retract the dagger and hide it behind her back. Surprisingly, but not shockingly, Brick could not make sense of the situation, so she just sat there and drooled on herself with a blank face. All of a sudden, the two girls heard a tractor outside, and the noise from the tractor broke the awkward silence. Slowly, Daisy exited the room with an ominous expression on her face.
The day after the second attempt to destroy Brick, the evil sisters almost lost hope and were beginning to give up, but then Rose was reminded of an old saying: “Third times the charm.” Suddenly, hope filled the sisters’ room, and they were at it again. Before they started, they took extra precautions to make sure that the crime didn’t lead back to them, planning how to cover their tracks so they would be untraceable. This time when they went to commit the crime, they went together. Just as they were walking into Brick’s room, Rose started to talk all about how when Brick was gone they would attract all the knights in Abstract and how they would finally be Daddy’s favorite little girls.
As they went into Princess Brick’s room, a scary silence filled the space with revenge and jealousy. Daisy and Rose were just about to kill Brick when suddenly, Brick rolled over in her sleep and passed gas, blowing her sisters away with her tremendous toot. The two evil sisters went flying through the balcony door, falling ten stories till they hit the ground. Everyone who witnessed them falling was hoping to hear two splats, but instead they heard two loud thumps that echoed throughout the kingdom.
Brick’s door was very old and had creaked loudly when opened, so the opening of the door had attracted the attention of one of the king’s servants, who had stayed and watched the whole thing go down. Later that morning, the servant told the king what he had seen. At first the king did not believe him, but then the king called Daisy and Rose to speak to him. Daisy said the servant was lying, but the king wasn’t buying it. The sisters were banished from the kingdom for attempting murder. The king decided they had detracted from the kingdom long enough and subtracted them from their positions as heirs to the throne.
Two years later, the evil sisters began to repay the witches with their arms and legs for a special princess stew. And Brick lived happily, but not intelligently, ever after.
The Terrible Crush
“Come here, Buffy. Ready to go on a walk?” asked Lindsay, ready to go on her daily walk with her dog.
“Ruff,” replied Buffy.
Lindsay and Buffy lived on a ranch with Lindsay’s attractive friend. The friend, Anthony, rented Lindsay’s guest house in the backyard. Anthony rented the guest house because he worked for Lindsay’s neighbor Steve so the guest house was conveniently located near to his place of employment.
Lindsay was out on one of her morning walks with Buffy when she saw Anthony suddenly tip over on Steve’s tractor. Lindsay’s heart had a contraction, which brought her to her knees. Lindsay immediately called 911. “Hello, Dispatcher, I have a nineteen-year-old who just fell off a tractor,” said Lindsay in a rush. Lindsay was not afraid of his insides getting hurt; she just wanted him to still look attractive. She believed that any scar would detract from his rugged good looks.
“Do not worry, Miss, he will be okay,” said the dispatcher, trying to calm Lindsay down. “Paramedics will be there in about five minutes,” added the dispatcher in a loud voice.
“Okay, that is great,” said Lindsay with a sigh.
“Reeeer- reeeer,” screamed the sirens of the fire truck, police car, and ambulance.
When the paramedics arrived at the scene, Anthony was trapped under the tractor. The fire fighters had to extract Anthony from underneath the vehicle. They hooked a chain up to the tractor and fire truck. As the fire truck began to pull, it lost traction and the fire truck began to slide. We could all see that Anthony was experiencing intractable pain. Lindsay jumped up and down to attract the neighbor for some help. The neighbor jumped in his Jeep and helped the fire fighters set Anthony free.
The paramedics rushed Anthony into the ambulance, as Lindsay got the strength to rise to her feet again.
Lindsay arrived at the hospital where Anthony had been transported. She was fearing the worst, but hoping for the best. She sat in the waiting room, for what seemed like hours, when she finally heard the waiting room door open. There stood the doctor who delivered Lindsay the bad news. He said that Anthony’s face had some major scars and his leg had been crushed in the accident.
“I do not care what he looks like, but may I please go see him,” asked Lindsay with a shaken voice.
“Follow me,” said the doctor.
The scars on Anthony’s face did not distract Lindsay. She had a deep attraction for Anthony, and she was not going to let his medical condition scare her away from her true feelings for him. When Anthony got out of the hospital, Lindsay reassured him that everything was going to be all right and gave him a big hug.
So this should be a lesson to all human beings that you should never judge a book by its cover.
Julie McGregor woke up in the morning, miserable with her brother sticking his toy tractor in her face, as always. However, not only did her body hurt from the tractor having a strange attraction to her face like a magnet, her heart and feelings inside hurt, too. She always got bullied at school.
Julie slumped, retracting her face from the tractor, which slid to the floor. She moved as slowly as a slug, walking into the kitchen.
Simultaneously, another girl, Alex Neil, was also waking up feeling wonderful, but stressed. She was ready to bully Julie on the playground. So she sprang out of bed, cracked her knuckles, and strode into her kitchen.
Both girls, the bully and the victim, took the bus to school. The bully, Alex, always bullied in the morning, belittling Julie with verbal bullying.
“You’re ugly and fat. You are so unattractive!” smiled Alex.
But Julie couldn’t fight back. It just hurt so much. So she just hid under the bus seat, trying to distract herself from Alex.
Then finally, it was second period, which was P.E. Alex started bullying again, but used social bullying by spreading even more hurtful rumors about Julie. One rumor was that Julie was a nerd and was obsessed with magnets. Julie did love the way the attracted to one another and detracted when opposite poles were placed together.
Then as time ticked by, it was lunch. This time Alex initiated some cyber-bullying by stealing Julie’s phone and sending mean texts to her friends. She also spread even more rumors by cell phone about Julie.
After that, Julie wanted to die, but Alex felt perfect. Finally, it was the last period of the day. There was an after-school club meeting to prepare for anti-bullying week. The teacher had a special contract to teach children about bullying. So Julie talked to the teacher about how Alex ruined her report on extracting things and abstracting things. Julie also shared how she felt so bad when she got bullied. She wanted the bullying to end. However, she didn’t know how to stop it. She started to cry and felt a contraction in her stomach. She felt like she had to throw up. It hurt so badly!
The teacher told Julie to relax. She taught Julie and the other students an acronym for some strategies for dealing with bullies. It’s called F.R.E.E.: Flow: Don’t let it bother you; Radar: Find a way to stay safe; Express: Stand your ground and speak up; Enough: Know when it’s time to ask for help. Julie tried using the F.R.E.E. strategies, and they helped. Alex never bothered her again.
If you ever get bullied use FREE! It worked for Julie. It can work for you. It will make you feel better!
The Great Movie
“Okay, come on, people. We really need to make a movie!” announced the director. “It has to attract the public’s attention,” the director continued, thinking about it. “I got it!!! We will make a movie about a tractor!!”
“Sir?” the director’s adviser asked. “Wouldn’t that movie be kind of lame?”
“NO!” screamed the director. “The movie will be great! It will be so attractive that it will be the number one attraction of the year!”
“Really?” inquired the adviser,
“Yes!” replied the director. “Now go get some cheap actors to sign a contract to be in this movie. And write an abstract of the script, will ya.”
Later that same day….
“Sir, I got some actors and wrote an abstract of the script.” The adviser handed it to the director.
“Thank you,” responded the director.
“And I was thinking,” added the adviser. “If this movie is going to be about a tractor, I thought we should know some things about them.”The director looked up from what he was reading.
“Yes, soooo?” questioned the director.
“We do not know a thing about them.”
“Then go extract some information from a book about tractors!” yelled the director. “And one more thing before you go. This script has a contraction in it. I hate contractions being used in the dialogue in my movies!”
“Yes, Sir,” the adviser squeaked and hurried off.
The next day…..
While the director was getting ready, the lead actor walked up to him. “I quit!” the actor yelled.
“WHAT!?!?” the director shouted in surprise. “If you quit, that will detract awesomeness from my movie!”
“Good!” The actor stormed off.
From his point of view, the adviser saw everything. He started to panic, but quickly thought of an idea. He went over to one of the people who did not get a part. He asked, “Hey, can you distract the director while I go find a new lead actor?”
“Wait,” the person breathed, perking up. “You need a new actor?”
“Yeah,” replied the adviser. “And fast.”
“Well, I could act for you,” offered the hopeful man.
“Sure,” said the adviser. “Come with me.”
After some talking, yelling, and finally signing, the new actor was in. They started to film the movie, and it went into theaters. Then the ratings came out.
Surprisingly the movie was a humongous success. Here are some of the reviews:
“Five stars for ’TRACTOR, THE MOVIE!!!’”
“BEST MOVIE OF THE MONTH!!”
“NUMBER ONE ATTRACTION OF THE YEAR!!!”
In the face of such rave reviews, the director began planning the next film: “FARM, THE MOVIE.”
Call of Duty
I was playing my favorite video game called “Call of Duty Black Ops,” and I had just reached Level Forty. I was doing quite well in the game until my little brother tried to distract me by playing with his toy tractor. I hit the wrong button, and my game froze. Feeling disappointed, I went to bed where I had a dream that a military General came to talk to me about a plan to get past enemy lines and destroy the enemy base. It was a great dream, but unfortunately, I woke to my annoying alarm, and I struggled to get out of bed. I went downstairs to get a bite to eat. I gasped when I realized that something was wrong. My parents were gone; the house was desolate with the exception of some abstract art on the walls. I was all alone.
Feeling panicked and confused, I went outside, and I saw nothing but military tanks, gun armories, and soldiers as far as the eye could see. I quietly walked around the military base because I did not want to attract any attention to myself. The main attraction at the base was the Officer’s Club so I went inside to see if I could find someone to tell me where I was. I found the General, and he told me I was at Camp Atzuwan, a military camp in eastern Iraq. I sat at a table and bought an ice cream soda that contained vanilla extract while I tried to figure out what was happening. I went outside, and I saw four planes fly over head. Then it hit me, I was in the game Call of Duty!
As I was walking, I saw an attractive lady walk out of a tent. She asked me if I could help her with a military attack plan which included a geometry formula and a subtraction equation. I borrowed a protractor from the General to help her with the problem. The General told us it was time for the mission to destroy the enemy base (just like in my dream). I was nervous, but I still went with it. We got in a military jeep that had intractable steel rocket launchers. We were driving as fast as Sonic runs, but it was okay because our jeep had good tires with great traction. The jeep also had powerful guns that could retract as we drove through the jungle and the camouflage paint could detract from our visibility, keeping the enemy from seeing us.
We drove along at top speed when all of a sudden, we hit a ditch, and the jeep crashed. We were all fine, but the jeep was stuck in the mud. The accident would definitely protract our mission since the jeep was stuck. We had to continue the mission on foot. As we were walking along, a boa constrictor latched on my leg, and I could see its muscle contraction as it squeezed. The General shot it, and we moved on. When we got to the enemy base, the enemy General came out and gave us a peace contract. We signed it, no one got hurt, and there was peace. Afterwards, we walked back to our camp, and I stepped inside my tent. Suddenly, I was lying in my bed at home. Feeling bewildered, I went downstairs where my parents were making waffles for breakfast. I told them what had happened, but like most parents, they simply told me that it had been just a dream. I tried and tried to make them believe me, but their reply was always, “Sure, Honey.” I went over to the couch to play some Call of Duty when I saw something. I dropped my controller in amazement as I saw the military General give a wink and say, “Mission complete.”